The logic of duck feces

Tuesday, 15 August 2006

Nothing I hate more than being wrong but it’s important to set things right, therefore–

Looks like it’s apology time again.

I was totally wrong to tell you that there is a park policy against feeding the ducks. My being polite did not mitigate the fact that I had no proof it was a park policy. For all I know it isn’t anymore. The prohibition signs which were once posted are long burned to carbon. It seems entirely possible that the park officials have decided to take down policy postings with kerosene for efficiency’s sake. I’m embarrassed I implied otherwise.

When you astutely deduced that I couldn’t be right about water fowl feces being a problem or else the City of Seattle would just kill the birds, you were showing, as you said, logic; true insight. And you were absolutely right again. The City of Seattle would absolutely never kill thousands of waterfowl nor addle 12,000 or more of their eggs. At least not again. It did work quite well when they did it three years ago in 2003.

Another friendly conversation with strangers

You were coming from a pure place and knew you hadn’t done anything wrong. That could be the only reason why you took the time away from feeding sugared cereals to ducks to chase me down without your family—though I did notice you remembered to bring your two rottweilers, probably they would have been scared to be alone—to try to make me agree with you, Bill O’Reilly style. I’m so sorry I remained unable to see your view and that I was a little worried about continuing the discussion with your dogs so close to my offspring.

So, after all the harm I caused you, I readily admit you were justified to flip me off. I deserved it. I had it coming and gratefully accept it as being a plus against the balance of my ongoing edification. I wish I had been man enough to admit it and apologize then. I know I haven’t been living right and it was a real wake up call for me to get straight with Jesus before my life spins any more out of control.

I do—however—take umbrage at the epithet you used against me. Nothing I did warranted you calling me “Liberal” in front of my children.

I await your apology and acceptance of same so that we may become the friends and fellow nature lovers we were surely meant to be.

Sorry to have been of trouble,


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