Copy Queen Papers, part 1, fax cover sheet

TO: COPY QUEEN & Taos at Large (and Phat!) & others of wandering tribes

FROM: The Minister of the Sinister… Ashley Pond da quint

TAOSI PERSONS I WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE THIS LETTER (Check ’em off as you call ’em, Joss): Everyone at CQ (natch; Sage Papers & Printing, Big Truck Judy, John Nichols, Marilyn Faust Jones, the whole crew; don’t be tight esses, when I’m rich I’ll make sure you’re taken care of [oh, that’s right, Pat, you’ll be taken care of])

  • Lou Pond & related girls (_______)
  • Jenny Redden (& Heather @ La Lana _______)
  • Liz Cunningham _______
  • Val Hanusik (Sorry… @ the Northside?)
  • Priska Winslow (_______)
  • Liz Winslow Fruits (ask Adrienne to check on her, I can’t find her number)
  • Ken & Jane Winslow (make them pay for it in advance; _______)
  • Bette & Ken Winslow (_______)
  • Pat (_______ but don’t give this number out to any of her deadbeat friends)
  • Lisa DeCaro (_______)
  • Cedar Goebel (¿Quale?)
  • Laine Overly (_______)
  • Ann Hawley (Please look it up for me)
  • & my sis who will surely give a copy to my mom (Adrienne: _______)

Anyone else (Todd and Sara?) with a couple (that’s a Taos couple=3) of bucks who cares or wants proof of my slander for a future lawsuit or to prevent me from successfully running for President in 2008 (I’ll just be old enough for that campaign!). And don’t be jerks this time, y’all. Clinton’s a lying spineless opinion poll watching ineffective Reagan Democrat sonofabitch and Dole makes him look like Lincoln. Vote Libertarian or Reform Party or pencil yourself in. Don’t make me cry. The moral choice is never in vain or foolish. Maybe it doesn’t matter to the bovine masses (or the press or the electoral college of the pseudo-democracy Pez-PAC land we [you] reside in) but it does matter to me and it could matter to you. Now where the hell do I get an absentee ballot?

IF anyone wants to send a copy to that rat bastard Neil Hamilton I will make it worth your while…

  • NH, _______ (_______)—OTHERS (if AN or JM are feeling really good to me)
  • Patrick Williams (and Shari Briggs), _______
  • Saundra B (Lisa D, please get her a copy)
  • Michelle DiCostanzo, _______
  • Leah & Bobby Salazar, _______
  • Doresa McCombs, _______
  • Anna Cypra, _______

NOTE FOR LISA G & PATRONS (or matrons, I don’t care) OF CQ

I discovered tonight that I have the ability to fax this masterpiece straight to the Queen’s lair. Phone plugs here are different on the wall end, so I foolishly assumed I couldn’t fax or modem anything. Of course the end that meets the phone is identical to US. Will wonders never cease! Now listen up, y’all. Miss Lisa Gordon (You can call her commissioner, or darling, or Mrs. Romero [I hope that gig is still on the honeymoon]) has done many wonderful things for me that she didn’t have to do; including but not limited to this stupid letter business. So don’t be tight. Spend some money at Copy Queen. Who else hires Taos’s un-employable like Lisa? Don’t ever let me catch you going to Mail Boxes Etweasela. Give Copy Queen all your copy related business. Lisa is worth it and she will make sure you are treated in accordance and your jobs are done as well as is possible. This letter ain’t free! Pay for it, or else. If I was there I’d make you pay for it. That’s how we’ll know my real pals, by how many copies of the letter sell… whoops, maybe this isn’t such a good idea. Maybe Lisa could give a discount…??? Or not… And Lisa, I read the HP manual, I know how much faxes cost CQ to receive… so don’t get all grinchy. I’ll come back and work free for a year or something if I’ve got to.

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