Sedition·com predictions for 2010

Tuesday, 29 December 2009

By date

January 1st – something terrible will happen in the Middle East.

January 2nd – something terrible will happen in North America.

January 3rd – something terrible will happen in South East Asia.

January 4th – something terrible will happen in South America.

January 5th – something terrible will happen in Africa.

Et cetera and so on and so forth.

General predictions

Scientific notation will become mainstream as budget estimates, predictions, and general fudging make it a necessity to preserve screen real estate and print resources. We predict it will be used by the Hem-Hess-Hem at least 1.3x105 times in 2010 alone.

Video games

A record number of young adults will die from marathon gaming. The Democrats will save us.

Housing & Banks

Banks will continue to go tits-up at the same rate as 2009. Mortgage defaults will continue apace. The Democrats will save us.

Jobs

Unemployment numbers will be worse than they have been in 50 years. The Democrats will save us.

Medical care

Despite 2,000 years of medical advances humans will continue to die. Doctors refuse to save them all because of a lack health insurance. The Democrats will save us.

Global warming

The world will end just like we’ve been warned and warned over and over. Why, oh, why didn’t we listen? The Democrats will save us.

Sedition·com

This ain’t funny to us either no more. Why won’t the Democrats just stop us?

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