Speaking of death

Tuesday, 9 January 2007

My Awesome Destiny

Last week I had a dinosaur fantasy/daydream wherein I got to see a large, richly hued carnosaur in person; maybe a giganotosaurus. So thrilling. Everything bird watching has ever been x 1,000.

I hadn’t adequately prepared the background of the daydream though. The dinosaur appeared unexpectedly out of the trees. My family was there with me and the nearest shelter was a hundred yards away across open ground in clear view.

Quietly, I get Julie to get the kids and head to safety while I distract the beast.

[Note to Jack Horner: I don’t know what the top speed of those things is but it is faster than I—or Justin Gatlin for that matter—can run.]

It grabs me up. And through the really surprising pain of 5 inch teeth through all my back muscles and jaws crushing the wind and fight right out of me I smiled. No matter how awful it was I could not help but think it was a truly cool way to die.

Nursing home pneumonia? Splech. Just let me hold on long enough to see genetic engineering get me the death I deserve. I can now accept I’ll never be the first man on Mars or even the 13th on the Moon but I still have an outside chance at being the first down the gullet of an Allosaurus.

That just made me shiver from terror and excitement. Funny, I never understood the drive behind S/M before.

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