This week in the news #11

Friday, 19 January 2007

Australia bans Japanese whalers from its ports

Good on ya’ mates.

Majority of US women living without spouse

Pick your own punchline–

  • Gay recruitment goals exceeded in 2006
  • Lifetime network to blame
  • Dogs and cats living together
  • Women cite Oprah as their role model for relationships, reading, and yo-yo dieting
  • Majority of US men report highest ever level of happiness
  • Sex and the City more nihilistic and depressing than ever
  • Vibrator sales climax
The only two blesséd women in America

Bush Going For Broke With Troop Surge

…I’m blessed to be the president. George W Bush, “60 Minutes” interview

Well, one man’s blessing is another 150,000,000 men’s curse. Not to leave out the women who are also, all but two, curséd.

“Grey’s” Star Apologizes For Using Slur

I apologize … for using a word that is unacceptable in any context or circumstance. Isaiah Washington

That’s PC drivel. All words have acceptable use, even including the one with which TR Knight could have fairly responded. Words are merely symbols for ideas or conceptions of things. Making a word illegal is the same thing as making a thought illegal. I can show you a perfectly acceptable, good etiquette usage of the word in question–

I’m going to blow my fagot in the 4th so well it would make a dead and deaf man happy. Any poor sap whose mom wouldn’t let him learn violin instead

Chinese Test Anti-Satellite Weapon

And, holy shit, it was successful. They killed one of their old satellites in the test. Not even a close or easy one to hit either.

Think of it. You can’t hide geo-synchronous satellites. Stealth technology was presumed to be beside the point so there are no stealth satellites and even if there were they’d have to be passive, never beaming information or transmitting on such a narrow beam as to be very difficult to find. Still with a telescope and a little time, you could find them all.

Sputnik stamp

Every satellite the US depends upon could, theoretically, be destroyed simultaneously. No more keyhole views. No more early detection of missiles. A semi-broken communication network. International disconnect. Total panic at home as every cellphone and Howard Stern broadcast goes dead. Not exactly a nation of sitting ducks but not much better.

The US and her allies are condemning the test for good reason for a change. It’s not quite as frightening as Sputnik was but it probably should be.

Iran gets army gear in Pentagon sale

Investigators have found the Pentagon’s inventory and sales controls rife with errors. Sharon Theimer, Associated Press Writer

Gasp!

If I had to just make up news, trying to get it right, that would have been one of my lead stories.

Obama launches 2008 White House bid

Hmmmm… scuttling Hillary Clinton is a good enough reason to back him but he also seems a decent fellow who might just be honest. Means he won’t stand a chance but also means it’s possible, remotely, that we’ll come out for him. So to speak.

Blair warns against Scottish independence

Fuck you, Tony. Man of the people? Man of the state. If England isn’t entitled to the rest of the jewels—India, Australia, the various islands and cuts of Africa—then you sure as fuck aren’t entitled to Scotland. You only still have them and the Emerald Isle because they were close enough for you to keep a lazy boot on their necks.

Adultery could mean life, court finds

Nice! I like to see that at least one legislature is taking the “till death do us part” clause at face value. Either everyone should go to this model or we should all admit that marriage is not a reasonable contract at all.

Miss New Jersey Ashley Harder Resigns

Ashley Harder? Have you seen her? How is it possible that this woman isn’t working in pornography? Time for an addendum to our predictions for 2007. No… 2009.

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