This week in the news #15

Friday, 16 February 2007

Madonna: “I want to be like Gandhi”

The punchline sort of jumped the gun on that one. Speaking of jumping… I think the eternal virgin just ran out of successful reinventions. Nice view of the shark though.

“Lucky” Paraglider blanked out in storm

From the AAP.

As she was carried higher and higher into the atmosphere, to the equivalent of almost 1,000 feet above Everest’s peak, Ms Wisnierska noticed ice forming on her sunglasses and instruments, before losing consciousness at about 20,000 feet.
“I don’t know who to thank, I thanked the angels, but I don’t believe in God,” Ms Wisnierska said.

God does seem to be awfully generous with the miracles when it comes to atheists.

Putin hits out at US global dominance

Remarks to US leaders, “You have no finesse. A teakettle of Strontium 90 can be more effective than an army if applied correctly.”

Funny Man Franken Will Run for Senate

I know we covered this two weeks back but it’s still news apparently and this time we write to make a simple editorial correction for the edification of newsdesks everywhere. There is a typo in the headline. It should read–

“Funny” Man Franken Will Run for Senate

Also, be careful with your experiments, Minnesotans. You wouldn’t want to end up with some kind of Frankensenator.

Gore Announces All-Star “Global Warming” Concerts…

Line up to include Canned Heat, Earth Wind & Fire, 98°, The Flaming Lips, and Pink Floyd.

Note: The Flaming Lips will also be playing the Herpes Aid festival sponsored by Valtrex®.

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