Can do

Saturday, 4 October 2008

The toughest part about deciding whether to vote McCain or Obama† is figuring out whether I would really rather fuck up Iraq and Iran or just Pakistan and Afghanistan. I mean, what happened to America’s can-do spirit? Is it too much to ask for a candidate who could do all four?

DonkleFant

† Age before beauty, honky.
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Discussion

Comments


mom

Re: Can do

Ah, so comforting to see I did something "right" as a parent...

By mom on 7 October 2008 · 10:41
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Ashley

Re^2: Can do

I’ll try not to get arrested until you’re either dead or too senile to understand the horrible things your boy has done.

I’m thinking of writing in “Putin” this November 5th 4th. There’s a guy with whom you know where you stand.

By Ashley on 7 October 2008 · 10:48
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mom

Re^3: Can do

Goes to show the kids are always smarter than the parents. Although I have given a lot of thought to write-in, Putin was not on my short list.

By mom on 7 October 2008 · 10:58
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William Shakesweasel

Re: Can do

I didn't consider Putin until I saw his instructional Judo video. If those aren't qualifications......

By William Shakesweasel on 10 October 2008 · 11:10
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Ashley

Re^2: Can do

Vladimir Putin showing how totally un-gay he is

Vladimir Putin demonstrating how totally not gay he is.

While I can respect his ruthlessness in killing journalists, this was actually all the information I ever needed.

By Ashley on 10 October 2008 · 11:12
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Vagrant

Re: Can do

J.J. Polachek is the non-man for the unjob. He's got the qualifications we need most.

By Vagrant on 16 October 2008 · 22:53
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Ashley

Re^2: Can do

Dude, I’m seriously considering writing him in just to have it in the public record for eternity… Or you know, till the records in D.C. are erased by the pulse that comes with the new pavement of nuclear glass.

On a completely unrelated note, I shot a squirrel in the ass (with an air-soft pistol, painful but totally non-lethal to a mammal) from 30 feet last week. He was chewing through my suet basket to get the goodies. At first he just looked at me like, WTF? I didn’t think he was even going to scram for a second. I think their brains just let the sting sink in slower.

On a completely related note, I signed up a student who had a similar lack of supporting evidence at my high school and enjoyed hearing him called at roll for weeks.

By Ashley on 16 October 2008 · 23:04
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Vagrant

Re^3: Can do

With autumn, I've lapsed into a weary resignation on the squirrel issue. They scamper past me unhurriedly, pausing now and then to glare their triumph. They know the likely outcome of the election.

As well, the angrily tailgating and passive aggressive obstructionist drivers know. Bush stickers have given way to Obama stickers. But the road pathology is the same, as are the nervously genial, disingenuous grins when they get out of their cars and realize their destination was mine too. They have that same shit-eating look that says, "I'm an asshole, tee hee hee, and I'll scream bloody murder to the cops if you hit me."

By Vagrant on 16 October 2008 · 23:32
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