Where we disagree with Ms. Rand

Friday, 26 March 2010

So where do you disagree with Ms. Rand? Just curious…

[Sedition · Germs. Um, sort of literally. She was a germaphobe. She grew up up in Russia on the cusp of the Communist revolution and it colored her perception and her ability to be truly objective. We here at Sedition·com are biologists first, philosophers… well eighth or ninth. We do have private lives, you know.]

Wow, so am I!
You know, Sedition, you may be my long lost twin from a Caucasian mother or something. I'm trying to hug my computer with the Sedition homepage on it - I think it's the closest we'll ever come to a salute...
I realize it sounds creepy, and I'm okay with that...

[Sedition · we endorse hugs (and kittehs) and it would take a bucket of scorpions soaked in gonorrhea to creep us out.]

Me: Ewwwwww. Seriously?

Myself: Did it creep you out?

Me: Yes.

Myself: I rest my rectum.

Me: You stole that.

Myself: Yeah, but Barnaby doesn’t read Sedition, so: WIN. Now, about this whole non-caucasian iss–

Me: No!

Myself: What?

Me: We have a fan. A fan. A real one, you thick-skulled, self-sabotaging jack-ass.

Myself: So while you sit back and wonder why…

Me: Oh, God.

Myself: I got this fucking thorn in my side.

Me: Stop.

Myself: Oh, my God! It’s a mirage.

Me: Quieter, the kids are sleeping.

Myself: I’m tellin’ y’all, it’s sabotage!

Me: Was the choice of a white rap band conscious?

Myself: What? You said sabotage, I was just, just–

Me: Just, just, just shut up.

Myself: …Dude, I’m the one who introduced you to Biggie Smalls.

Me: Yeah, how come you always press skip when I’m trying to listen to Del tha Funkee Homosapien?

Myself: But I’m totally into Asian chicks. How can I be racist?

Me: …I have no response to that.

Myself: Good.

Me: You know, you don’t win these things as much as simply tire me out.

Myself: Endurance is more important than truth.

Me: And you stole that.

Myself: Dead motherfuckers bring no suits.

Me: If I say, “You win,” can I go to bed?

Myself: I don’t know. Does it work with y–

Me: Don’t!

Myself: I win?

Me: You win.

Myself: Good. Night.

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