New Year’s 2003

Saturday, 4 January 2003

I’m not doing it for some purple dinosaur in the sky or some bearded peacenik Nazarene.

I’m doing it because it makes life better. More valuable.

This is something we have needed to straighten out for a long time and I think New Year is the perfect time.

You’re not a bad person if you’re not as pretty as the people on television. If you don’t drive a Lexus or even understand why someone would buy anything but a house if they had 60 thousand dollars, you’re not a bad person. You’re not even a bad person because you like things the Pastor or Priest said you shouldn’t like or that you want more than you have.

You are a bad person because you cheated on an exam. You are a bad person because you said you’d taken care of something when you hadn’t. You are a despicable piece of trash because you took credit for something someone else did. The world is worse. The entire world is worse for your lies or your slight. Maybe you weren’t lucky enough to make it to Kenneth Lay or George W heights, maybe you were. You made the world worse if you’re a telemarketer. You made the world worse if you’re a Senator.

And you smirk because you think, “No,” or, “So what?”

But you know it. Nothing can take it away because it doesn’t matter how many people you can cheat or lie to or fool. You’ll always know, whether they ever do or not. You know even if you’re only that out of work writer or that movie star. You know that you only got that far out of luck because you don’t know a damn thing about the world whirling past you. It’s where that little tickle in your gut comes from. It’s where the lack of satisfaction lies even when you’ve acquired something you long thought you’d wanted.

You know it. And maybe you can escape admitting it today. Give it some time. It’s not going anywhere.

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