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Devil’s 
Dictionary X Daily Definitions XML
Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
Original Devil’s Dictionary Own the original, The Devil’s Dictionary (thrift edition)
Newest definitions — The Devil’s Dictionary X™-----------------------
Semite
a Jew or Arab or any of their ancestral peoples; one term encompasses both as the rest of world can’t tell, nor has any interest in learning to tell, the difference.
Communism
a form of government based on the theory that neighbor-interest is a stronger force in nature than self-interest; the only successful implementation of this style of government to date is the Beverly Hills Chamber of Commerce.
accident
1. a legal opportunity.
2. God showing his displeasure with your choice of friends.
3. the only word in the English language which has come to be used exclusively in a facetious or ironic sense; we propose a new grammatical rule for this word—that it exclusively appear in quotes.
economist
a devotee of chaos theory, without the math degrees; a person whose unbroken string of losses at Monopoly has spawned a vendetta against bankers and property holders; a weather man for economies.
see also weather man.
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