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Devil’s 
Dictionary X Daily Definitions XML
Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
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Newest definitions — The Devil’s Dictionary X™-----------------------
Rapture, the
the joyous rising to Heaven which the 144,000 best Christians will experience upon the onset of the world’s end; thus far 75 generations of the faithful have missed the date in favor of providing nutrition for nematodes but the living hold out hope we’ll all die together soon so they may see God’s face and the rest of us can take our rightful place in Hell serving the Devil iced tea during a 10 minute damnation break each millennium.
think
1. to read too much into a matter; to over-analyze.
2. procrastinate.
wrong
1. in Western philosophy, precisely one half of right.
2. in Eastern philosophy, what all rights must be repaid with to ensure universal harmony.
aardvark
an audacious creature chiefly remarkable for its length of tongue, fondness for ants, and precociousness in lexicons.
turn
1. in sexual relationships, one’s place in line.
2. in a woman, the repulsion phase directly following successful attraction; as in one hundred and eighty degrees.
3. in housework, one’s time to shine.
adventitious
1. relating to a government conspiracy; a plot.
2. anything to do with an ex-lover; pointless.
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