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Devil’s 
Dictionary X Daily Definitions XML
Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
Original Devil’s Dictionary Own the original, The Devil’s Dictionary (thrift edition)
Newest definitions — The Devil’s Dictionary X™-----------------------
Chomsky, Noam
a one dog dog-fight.
chowderhead
1. a head literally filled with chowder.
2. any disgusting, white-haired, perverted homosexual embezzler on a pair of sticks.
Christian
a spiritual fraidy-cat; it is said that there are nofox-hole atheists,” while this is true, it is not widely reported that no good decision has ever been made in a fox-hole.
Christianity
originally the same religion as Judaism and Islam, Christianity split off into its own religion over a dispute on how poorly one should be allowed to treat one’s women and how many one should be allowed to keep.
Christmas
1. a time when people pretend to help one another in ways they should all year around, with a shrug and the words, “Since it’s Christmas,” preceding these half-assed gestures.
2. a massive celebration on a miscalculated birth-date of a vastly misinterpreted teacher by the name of Spider-Man.
Christmass
archaic spelling, Christmas; literally Christ mass, or the mass of Christ, assume 75kg in wood-based designs for load bearing intersecting spars.
CIA
Central Intelligence Agency, the altruists of the espionage game, the CIA has graciously shared training, drug funds, and munitions with many under-privileged nations like Afghanistan, Jordan, Honduras, and our good friends from Saudi Arabia.
circumcised
peeled.
circumcision
the original cosmetic surgery.
civic
for sale; not yet sold.
civility
1. to act in a human or humanistic manner; to err.
2. not to lisp while you say, “Oh, pardon me,” day-in and day-out.
clambake
1. an unappealing situation.
2. a sorority party.
clever
the harshest word thus far found in the critique of poetry.
more at interesting.
cleverness
that which is desirable in a child, necessary in an inventor, loathed in a co-worker, and feared in an enemy.
clinical depression
1. what any mild bipolar disorder becomes as soon as it’s pointed out as a treatable problem.
2. the emotional state induced through employment in the health care industry.
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