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Devil’s 
Dictionary X Daily Definitions XML
Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
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Newest definitions — The Devil’s Dictionary X™-----------------------
France
clocking in at 8 days in the summer of 1940, the Surrender Champion of the World; in a startling display of environmental responsibility, Germany becomes the first nation to recycle as a matter of policy by making the French sign surrender papers in the self-same train car that Germany had used for the task in 1918.
Francisco, Bambi
a wall-eyed escapee from the Playboy Mansion who seems to have something to do with economics in a more specific way than how many $20s will fit in her bikini bottom.
Francophile
syn, fecophile.
fraternity
1. a Greek habit from the Latin, frater, for brother; brotherhood.
2. mental collusion and spiritual sodomy.
free market, the
the carrot market.
see also capitalism and freedom.
free thinker
one whose thoughts are for sale at discount of tuppence.
free verse
the highest form of poetic expression thus far developed by mankind—while retaining all the smarm, kitsch, and smugness of other poetic forms, the lack of rhyme and meter renders it mercifully easy to flush from one’s memory like a turd without the least buoyancy.
free will
1. erratic and unpredictable behavior in another.
2. proof of God.
3. proof against God.
4. a possession native to men over 65 and women under 15.
freedom
the right to choose one’s carrot.
friend
one with a knack for hiding daggers.
friendly
adj, describing a person in need.
friendship
a ghost ship.
see also cursed ship.
frog
disparaging, epithet for a race of men who, oddly, do not eat flies and live with snails but eat snails and draw flies.
frugal
1. fiscally conservative—unwilling to sponsor walks that propose to cure diseases or buy cookies from children in uniform—ornery.
2. practical; able to distinguish the difference between selling out and selling out.
3. folding one’s first wad of toilet paper in half again after the second wipe.
frustration
1. livelihood; awareness; being in possession of one’s faculties.
2. the early stages of success in business; a middle rung on the ladder to freedom, where freedom is defined by moderate financial security and a handball sized chunk of prostate cancer; a good start.
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