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Devil’s 
Dictionary X Daily Definitions XML
Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
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Newest definitions — The Devil’s Dictionary X™-----------------------
K
33% of the way to Georgia from California.
kangaroo
see xylophone.
Kansas
34th American state, its name taken from the Kiowa word for “flaming sack of buffalo shit which threatens to drag down entire tribe.”
Kant, Emmanuel
a philosopher whose followers are often called after their master as a compliment for how well they emulate his suppositions, e.g., “That bloke is a right Kant.”
karma
1. the persistent accrual of universal good or ill-will toward one via one’s ability to exaggerate or conceal the same.
2. every trip to the shower during a child-molestor’s stay at a maximum security incarceration facility.
Kerry, John
a man who marches in protest, writes in protest, and speaks in protest against war and its ugly accidents, such as baby killing; methinks the Senator doth protest too much.
kidney stone
an old, hardened kidney to be used as a projectile, especially in Medieval warfare.
kike
a Jewish [Yiddish] word for another, especially poorer, Jew; an unfortunate manifestation of karma.
killing
a strongly pronounced success in a venture—usually expressed, “to make a killing”—in various areas from the stock market to a relationship.
kind
1. dishonest.
2. scheming.
3. horny.
King, Martin Luther, Jr
1. a man of tremendous clarity, charisma, and wisdom who implored humans to judge each other based on their characters which has somehow come to be interpreted as meaning, “100 years of handouts won’t be enough.”
2. in cities, the boulevard which acts as a dividing line conveniently alerting rich people where not to go.
King, Stephen
1. a prolific prate.
2. a prate prolific.
KKK
see Ku Klux Klan.
knowledge
1. the first taste of the first bite, everything that follows is referred to as surfeit.
2. an unpleasant blockage separating Man from paradise.
kooky
a zany way to write “wacky.”
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