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Devil’s 
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Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
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Microsoft
a compound Greek-English term meaning tiny and flaccid.
midterm
a medically imperative one week break from sex, booze, and ecstasy.
Midwest
1. the history of “sprawl,” expressed in a 2,200 mile road trip.
2. not quite West and not quite East; sometimes North but never quite South—a location and culture based more on what it isn’t than what it is—a land of negations.
3. a kindly bunch of folk whose children enjoy parental compassion lasting as long as two weeks at home between semesters or jobs, and up to as many as three whole digits worth of freely given love.
MILF
a totally rude and inappropriate acronym, Mother I’d Like to F***; sometimes written milf; the MILF is largely an urban legend which is at odds with the ubiquity of the all too real JFCIREDTSSMBTBSDTFTVSPSBCYCM; Jesus Fucking Christ, I’d rather eat diarrhea through a straw or slam my boner in that bitch’s SUV door than fuck that vodka soaked pile of silicon, botox, and cellulite you call, “Mom.”
mine
possessive pronoun, the opposite of yours.
minion
a paralegal.
Minnesota
1. a state famous for its unsavory timepieces.
2. birthplace of the MMPI—Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory—an exam used by corporations to bar employment from those with personal defects such as monophasic ethics.
mirror
a telescope with a 1:1 magnification power which shows all the evil in the world when viewed at right angles.
misanthropy
compound term, miss + anthrop-, the philosophy of those who dearly miss humanity.
misery
1. kinship.
2. empathy.
misfortune
the result of any firmly embedded sense of idealism, mixed with a carefree willingness to leave one’s bedroom.
mishap
a conception; the failure to sterilize.
mistake
1. a vow of allegiance to a nation.
2. the loan of anything to a friend.
3. sixty seconds unpaid at work.
4. an honest remark to a woman.
misunderestimate
to inadequately assess the popularity of corruption and stupidity.
Mitnick, Kevin
a lecturer who is paid handsomely by corporate executives to explain to their employees what the management apparently doesn’t understand either, that people are gullible.
see also hacker.
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