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Devil’s Dictionary X™
The Devil’s Dictionary X now has 1,268 terms defined!
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Newest definitions — The Devil’s Dictionary X™-----------------------
what any person who has friends becomes upon conviction of a crime.
rock star
a charismatic binge-drinking pedophile in a tour-bus.
an area of study which disproves the theory that “mother always knows best.”
see also mother.
1. an immature cynic.
2. an unrefined person; someone with little or no life experience.
1. sarcasm; a scathing mockery of something considered, by someone, romantic.
2. that which is easily mocked; the study of what is ridiculous.
3. a vanished genre of literature which describes life not as it is but as it should be; literary sadism.
that which is meant to protect and shelter but which instead drenches, attracts plagues of rodents, and plunders home improvement loans.
1. a manipulative head on a bundle of bones and muscles which can’t look you in the eye in the morning or admit to wishing you dead in the evening.
2. a guilt dispenser; that which dispenses guilt.
3. one who steals from your change jar at a rate of three to twenty dollars a year.
Roosevelt, Eleanor
the last (read, “final”) great American President of the United States.
Roosevelt, Franklin Delano
1. usually abbreviated FDR; a differently abled US President who felt the need to share his physical condition by imposing it upon those he governed.
2. the best case study to date demonstrating timing, sympathy, and famous kin are all it has ever taken.
3. a man whose tenure in New York State and US National government coincided nearly to the day with the start and the end of the of the Great Depression.
4. the man who so terrified the rational citizens of his day that the very reasonable 22nd Amendment to the US Constitution passed soon after he did.
5. the poster-boy of revisionist history.
consider a paperback at $6.95 sold at a 20-40% discount by major retailers, multiply by middling popularity in first run and then zero demand in second over-run that will have to be destroyed or returned to the publisher at the first-time author’s expense—now consider the 5% of the net profit that the author takes home in reward for several years of hard work and pain, and dealing with publishers and an uncaring agent—this is the royalty.
acronym, “read the fucking manual,” used almost exclusively by those whose diction, grammar, and spelling tend to demonstrate they could stand to RTFD.
rumpus room
a positively disgusting way of saying, “game room.”
Russian man
1. basically your all-American, meat and potatoes kind of guy, with the potatoes being home-made vodka and the meat being the extra pounds he likes on his woman’s backside.
2. one in doubt, who doesn’t want to rush into anything, such as an ending to a draggingly complex novel; e.g., Dostoevski, Tolstoy.
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