1.
one who cannot write; one whose chief form of self-expression is censure.
2.
an old lady terrified that inclusion of the words alright, alot, and ain’t in standard English usage guides will somehow make life no longer worth living.
3.
a goon with a red pencil and a talent for alliteration.
4.
an incompetent writer who has learned the trick to never being criticized for awful writing: put someone else’s name on it.